We are all seeking meaning and purpose in our lives. I expect we all feel like we want to contribute something of value to this amazing planet. Even though in the big picture our time here is fleeting, we still want to leave our mark.
Of course, if you look closely at everything in nature you will find endless "purpose". The awesome complexity and beauty of nature never fails me. And as I grow older, I become more skilled at seeing it in everything. Yet seeing beauty doesn't always happen easily, especially in the midst of depression, yet even in our suffering and anguish, there is wonder and amazement all around us. We just have to make a practice of looking for it.
But what does this have to do with gardening you might ask?
Recently, I've been thinking a lot about plant hoarding. Perhaps because I must confess I am a plant addict. I justify all of this "collecting" by saying to myself "it's for your nursery" or "I want it so that I can give it away to others". While there is real joy in sharing plants with others, the real reason I hoard is that I'm a plant addict and I get a tangible, though temporary, high from acquiring a new botanical treasure.
As a plant snob, I have highly discriminating tastes... I don't want just any common thing. As a rule of thumb, if it shows up in the parking lots of Chick-fil-A or Walmart, or any other chain, I don't want it. If the day ever comes when fast food restaurants begin landscaping with trilliums and Lycoris, I'll be in serious trouble.
When something is rare, we treasure it more!
Yet I can become so consumed with constantly acquiring new plants that I fail to fully love and appreciate what I have. Our love for each individual plant diminishes as our collection grows. We simply don't have enough time or attention to love everything. Yet we often underestimate our capacity to love and share ourselves with others. Gardening can be a conduit to expand our social network and form deep bonds with others, just as with any other hobby. Sharing plants with people is one important way that I bond with others and make friends.
But back to my previous point about getting caught up in the disease of plant addiction. It is known from multiple studies that the more choice we have, the unhappier we become. I can't remember the source, but I've read that overall stress and anxiety increased in Soviet bloc countries as they transitioned from communism to a free market economy. It's speculated that an increase in day-to-day choices/ decisions, especially in food and other products, led to declining levels of happiness. Simply put, the more options we have, the more anxiety we feel.
I can certainly see this relationship in my own life. If my choices are limitless, for example when looking for something to watch on youtube, I often just give up because I simply can't make a decision. I usually end up not watching anything or just constantly surfing without truly committing to a show. As much as it pains me to say this, I can't tell you the last time I finished a book or movie. Because of the availability of everything at all times, my attention span has atrophied. With me, the grass is always greener in other pastures.
And just as in every other aspect of our modern lives, we now have more plants available to us than at any time in history. If we can't find it at the mega garden center, we can certainly find it online. Even Etsy and Amazon are beginning to offer plants.
If you have a plant addiction like me, you must institute limitations, not only to preserve your bank account but also to avoid spreading yourself too thin. It is key to remind yourself that each new plant will require digging a hole, regular watering, and ongoing maintenance. We must also remind ourselves that the joy we feel in the acquisition is only temporary, and the real foundation of happiness comes from appreciating the beauty in everything, not just things that "belong" to us.
I want to stress that I don't condemn collecting per se. The obsessives who amass jaw-dropping gardens full of "specialties" are actually quite a valuable asset to plant preservation and the horticulture community. Their collections serve as crucial repositories that can, if shared, help sustain rare plants for future restoration efforts and markets. The key word is "sharing". It does nothing for preservation if we hoard our treasures and don't make a concerted attempt at propagation and sharing. It always upsets me to see a wonderful collection slip into neglect and chaos as the owner ages and can no longer care for it.
The correlation and tension between having more and appreciating less is real! It is a careful balancing act. Though I do believe it is possible to expand our capacity for love and attention, my observations largely prove the opposite. Picture the child with only a few dolls versus a child with a hundred. The child with one or two knows each one in and out and loves them with a greater intensity than the child with many. Her love is spread thin. While I get the analogy is a stretch, I do feel its substance applies to all aspects of materialism, including plants. There is a danger in becoming too attached to our possessions; therefore, I recommend developing a practice of minimalism and giving.
So what does all this endless rambling have to do with anything? If you were to look at my garden and my countless pots of esoteric plants, you would probably faint. I realize I have a problem, so I write because I want to process my own destructive tendencies. As with everything in life, there is no right or wrong way to live, but I do feel it is important for us to strive for a certain simplicity and generosity. By reminding myself of the fleeting joy that comes from collecting things, I can help free myself from the chains of materialism and greed.
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